Become Anyone You Want in Life
The Secret of Stepping Outside of Your Own Limitations
In college I was absolutely obsessed with ballroom dancing. It was a raging passion and I spent nearly all of my disposable income on taking lessons from the best professional dancers possible. I dreamed about it daily and danced nearly 8 hours a day trying to master the various techniques.
But there was a problem.
Ballroom dancers exude a strong “sexiness” that I’d never have. In fact, it would embarrass me to death to even try. I couldn’t practice “being sexy” (or whatever it’s called for men) by myself so there was NO WAY I could do it in front of other people.
I was stuck, and I wasn’t ever going to be the dancer I wanted to be. It was infuriating!
Then, during an especially frustrating lesson, an instructor said something that changed my life.
She saw me struggling and said, “Just pretend you’re someone else”.
I stared at her blankly. What did she mean?
In a panic, I did the only thing I could think of, I began acting just like someone would on a theatrical stage. I took on a new character.
Without me fully realizing it, an incredible thing happened that day. I began acting like someone completely different than “me” and unbelievably, just like that, I became someone new.
With a little practice I shed my own insecurities and took on a new persona, one that had no problem shaking his hips and being a strong, sensual dancer. The “sexy” person I believed wasn’t me was actually hiding inside of me all along.
Up to that point I’d been so attached to who I had always been, that I couldn’t allow myself to be anything new.
Once I learned to throw off my self made restraints, my life changed. I discovered the first step to creating anything new is allowing it to exist in your mind.
To become what you can be, you must let go of what you have been
~Lao Tzu
You may have done this by accident in the past, but I’m telling you that you can now become anyone you want by conscious choice.
Simply decide who you want to be and “channel” that person. Allow yourself full permission to BE whatever fits that role. It might feel awkward at first because you’ve never done it. That’s normal with anything — even new things that ARE you.
Take on the role as if you were truly and authentically someone else. Go in deep. You’ll be blown away at what might come out.
For example, Alabama Crimson Tide college football fans are known as some of the most devoted and passionate in the country. On any Saturday afternoon during football season you’ll see many of them drinking heavily, swearing, and acting absolutely insane.
But most of these super fans are also conservative church goers the next morning. They are humble, hard working “salt of the earth” folks during the week, and the complete opposite of what they become on game day.
So what allows them to be so utterly different when their team plays?
They give themselves permission.
They are no longer “Roger from the Boot Barn”. They fully take on the role of an “Alabama Crimson Tide Football Fan”. In this role, they believe it is completely normal to act absolutely crazy and passionate. In fact, the crazier the better!
They simply flip a switch internally and give themselves permission to be someone completely different. They are still the same person, but they’ve let a different side of themselves emerge without even realizing it. The best part is that most of them absolutely LOVE being able to “let go” this way.
This can be done in any area of your life.
Yes, even for you.
Never been someone who was outgoing? Then take on a role and pretend to be the most outgoing person you know. Think about what they would do, how they would think, and act it out.
Sure, at first it will feel like “acting”. It might be uncomfortable for a few minutes, but that will pass faster than you think and you might even enjoy the freedom it will allow.
Have you ever wished you could be someone who dresses differently? More stylish, chic, or classy?
Pick a person or persona you want to emulate and give yourself permission to play that part. Buy the clothes and dress the part. Maybe you even have the clothes already and just haven’t let yourself wear them.
Do it!
Want to become a business owner or a writer? Just begin acting as if it’s true. Walk the walk as if you were born into it.
But wait, what about other people? What will they think?
Your friends, family, and coworkers.
They only know the version of you that you’ve already been showing them on a regular basis. You may be worried what they will think if you change.
Here’s what you can do…
Practice with people who will support you.
Talk to someone you trust and tell them what you want to try out. Get them to play the game with you. Have them dress up with you and go out. Have them be your “wingman” if you’re practicing being outgoing at a networking meeting.
If you don’t have someone you trust enough, go somewhere that you don’t know anyone. Meetups, clubs, yoga classes… whatever. Practice your new character around people that don’t have any preconceived notions about who you are.
After you’ve tried out your new role(s) a few times it will get easier.
My experience has been that once you begin practicing taking on these “roles”, people will see you as someone who can (and might) do anything. Being unpredictable, adaptable, and unafraid to try something new is who they now expect you to be.
Imaging the freedom to be whatever & whoever you want. It’s all there just waiting for you to give yourself permission.
Who you get to be in life is solely determined by who you allow yourself to be. Nobody else gets to choose. Victim or victor, all people are self made.
Even if you think someone else is preventing you from being someone different, you’ve chosen to let them keep you in that strangle hold. Every aspect of your life has been created by you, even if you don’t realize it.
That can be a scary thought. But once you realize it’s true, you’ll also see that you can begin creating any life you choose from here forward. Simply give yourself permission to take on the roles you’d like to live out in life and they’ll become real.
I’ve used this idea to do everything from dancing on tables in dance clubs to starting my own businesses.
I’ve discovered that I can literally be anyone I want if I’m willing to step out of myself and fully embrace the character I desire. It is a little intimidating at first, but you’ll soon learn that anything you need is within you. You simply need to let that version of you out!
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